17–23 March 1856

The day before yesterday I accidentally read Longfnov’s letter, and have sent him a challenge. God knows what will come of it, but I shall be firm and resolute. The affair has on the whole had a good effect on me.- I am making up my mind to go to the country, marry as soon as possible, and not to write under my own name any more. Above all, always and with everyone be reticent and careful in conversation ! Activity, pure- heartedness, content with the present, and search for love. My chief mistake in life has been to let reason take the place of feeling, allowing my flexible reason to replace what conscience called good by what conscience called evil. Why does love, which dwells in the soul, not find satisfaction when it encounters the person who evokes it ? Vanity destroys it. Modesty is the chief condition, the sine qua nony of mutual love.