12–18 May 1862

On coming home in the afternoon, Dr. Macleod came to see me, and was so clever, agreeable, kind and o-ood. We talked of dear Albert's illness, his readiness to go hence at all times, with which Dr. Macleod was much struck, and said what a beauti- ful state of mind he must always have been in— how unselfish — how ready to do whatever was necessary ; and I exemplified this by describing his cheerful- ness in giving up all he liked and enjoyed, and being just as cheerful when he changed to other circumstances, looking at the bright and interest- ing side of them ; like, for instance, going from here to Windsor and from Windsor to London, leaving his own dear home, etc., and yet being always cheerful, which was the reverse with me. He spoke of the blessing of living on with those who were gone on before. An old woman, he said, whom he knew, had lost her husband and several of her children, and had had many sor- rows, and he asked her how she had been able to bear them, and she answered : " Ah ! when he went awa' it made a great hole, and all the others went through it." And so it is, most touchingly and truly expressed, and so it will ever be with me.