25 June–1 July 1855

Was rather lazy in the morning. Was censorious with Stolypin at whose place I was in the evening. My health is better. Rules : Order everything from large towns. Start two notebooks ; the first for rules, the second for observations and occupations. In the second strike out as things get done, and look it over at the beginning of each month. Or better, have four divisions of the Diary : (i) rules, (2) observations and occupations, (3) thoughts, (4) facts. To-day among facts : the journey of 186 Finnish sharp-shooters despatched on January 4, of whom 92 reached the Crimean army on June 16 ; and the other : the hungry infantry officer who fed himself by sampling the soldiers’ food.

Finished the Spring Night , but no longer think it as good as I did at first. Cannot reproach myself with anything

Was at Bakhchisar&y. Read a Spring Night to Kov£l£vski, with which he was very well satisfied. My self-love was also flattered, and I was irritated against Kryzhanovski by learning from Kovatevski that I was long ago invited to take part in the Brussels Magazine. What a fellow Vr^vski is ! They say he is a drunkard. Yesterday I was so struck by the strange fact that Lodi, who speaks all the languages, lives idly, using tallow candles and Crimean tobacco, that unable to understand it, I simply asked why he used tallow candles and Crimean tobacco. I am so far removed from and unaccustomed to people with that failing that I did not understand it at all. He, Chernyaev, and 1, sat in a little Bakhchisar£y tavern, when suddenly there entered from a side door a most A very cheap kind. ridiculous, thin, pale, man, who silently sat down on the counter. He seemed to us a mere shadow, and Lodi began to walk up and down the room singing, “ Cest peut-Stre un espion, c'est trte possible Excellent ! I cannot reproach myself with anything. Yes — for indecision. Did not leave Bakhchisaray when I meant tk>. On the 28th I am going to Sevastopol.

How I used the day. Early in the morning left Bakhchisaray and reached my lodgings, had something to eat, gave orders, wrote a little of the Diary, and rode into Sevastopol. At Inkermann gave money to Elchanfnov, visited the Staff — which becomes more and more repulsive to me — and finally went to Sevastopol. The first thing I met was a shell, which burst between the Nikoldevski and the Grafski streets. (Next day bullets were found near the Library.) The second was the news that Nakhfmov is mortally wounded. Bronevski, Meshch^rski, and Kaloshin, are all nice and are fond of me. On the return journey next day, June 29 — the morning of which I spent partly in the officers’ battery, partly with Meshch^rski and at Inkermann — I found Baron F^rzen and was exceedingly glad. It seems that I am really beginning to acquire a reputation in Petersburg. The Emperor has ordered Sevastopol in December to be translated into French. Vr£vski, whom I visited to-day (June 30), seems an empty fellow. To-day I am in a terribly bad state of mind, and the provisioning is not in order. They are always stealing, and terribly ! Have to reproach myself these two days : (1) with intemperance — I drank wine and kvas, etc., and with vanity, once in the presence of Bron&vski and a second time of Boborykin. Facts : There are some people whose courage is like that of stud stallions, who are terribly frightening when they are brought out but are quite quiet when saddled. It is said that the late Tyurtyukdvski was a pure Russian and a handsome young officer. Standing at the battery he used to stamp his feet and clap his hands, calling, “ First, second, third. . . ” Before the assault one shell fell after another in the Vol^nsk Redoubt, no one went in or out. The corpses were swung by their legs and arms and thrown over the parapet. Nikiforov's story of running away is interesting. When a man is hit, it seems to him that he is flying upwards. Rules and thoughts : When leaving home always take a man with me. Try each month to set 200 rubles aside, partly from the provisions and forage-money and partly from the money for my writings, and write to the village that they are to pay my debts to Zubkov, Dusseau, Chevalier, Charmer, and so on, and in any case I must myself collect 1500 rubles by New Year. Observa- tions. Occupations. To write to the village. Correct the “ Aristocrats ”, “ The Black Earth ”.2

Returned to my lodging. Was in the very worst frame of mind. Wrote letters to Valerian and to Pelageya Illnishna. Read and gave orders. Must reproach myself strongly for irritability. To-morrow will set to work on Youth . Facts : A commissariat commander gave 300 rubles to a girl in a brothel where he stayed two days and recited verses to them.

Behaved very badly. Did nothing, though I tried tcf draw up a plan of Youth , but could not collect my thoughts. . . . Wrote a letter to Nikolenka, which how- ever was ill-considered. Must rewrite it. Yesterday wrote letters to Valerian and to Aunt Paulina. Facts : Is there anything stupider than the ioi shots we fired at the enemy’s trenches on the Emperor’s birthday ? “ It’s the Tsar’s name-day. I’m glad, and I’ll give it you ! ” Obser- vations. Occupations. Order good writing appliances. Reproaches : lack of character, depression of spirits. Ate apricots. Idleness.